Sept.9.2011
-People in the past believed black cats represented bad luck or misfortune.
As soon as I came to school, I went to the counselor’s room directly to check my schedule still...Again, I could not get my schedule what I have requested since Monday. Because of that, my face was filled with stress and worries. I did not imagine the beginning of my grade 11 life was so stressful. It was a big deal to me that getting a proper timetable for semester one and two. Irritated, while I was walking down the hallway loudly, I thought that an event like this really is related to luck. Even though I don’t believe in luck, I always think that practicing and trying can make luck in difficult situations.
Being stressful with this happening does not make things better. The one who would get tired and weary will be me, myself. Therefore, I am not going to think about my timetable again and start accepting it in order to finish my grade 11 life enjoyable.
For today, I like to choose the word, bad luck because today was all about my bad luck which are I could not take social studies in semester one and am in the waiting last to take foundational math 11 in semester two. I like to leave with two questions. “What is the standard between people who have bad luck like me and people who always have luck in anything?” “Is it possible that I can be a lucky person?”
Sept. 12
-People in the Brave New World should remember this satement.
Started to read the novel, “Brave New World”, I was excited. This is my first time to read this famous book. Even though I knew that this book was amazing and evolutionary, I was afraid to read it because I did not think I could understand this huge meaningful book.
Usually, I want to explore new adventure and start something I have not tried but in my mind, there is fear and anxiety. Thinking negatively ceases me from being adventurous and audacious. This results me to think of words, boring and ordinary. Getting out of comfort zone is not easy to everyone. However, since I break the zone that surrounds me, the next step would be adventurous.
I sometimes feel that my whole life is focused on going to university that everyone wants to go. What is I don’t go any other post-secondary schools? What if I there is nothing I want to do at the end of graduating high school? Grade 11 is the time for me to think seriously about the future and what I really want. Doing research, brainstorming, or asking someone who can provide many information and their experiences would be some ways. I do not think it is late to think more honestly about the life after I graduate high school. Even writing a journal once a week helps a lot to organize and manifest thoughts.
Sept. 23
-The reality of modern people
In English class, I acquire a lot of connections between the world in the book, “Brave New World”, and the world today. Even though the author of this book wrote this book in 1932, today’s world starts to become similar to the story in the book. People want more and cannot satisfy with what they have. To satisfy them, the media and companies make more and develop technology and products.
As I think about the society today, it’s all about the money which led people to the facet of massive production. Everything today is produced massively. They are all identical and produced at once. It could be same in human being. I realized the rapid technology process through reading article that the teacher gave us. It was about the parents are able to pick the traits of their future children. For example, they can establish the diseases their children would get or the appearance. It was bizarre. Imagining the society like that remains me the word, superabundance greed of people. Wanting everything perfect, people keep developing with technology. It is true that there are some possible advantages like preventing their children from getting serious diseases, but what if they do not satisfy with their babies because their babies do not come up with what they expect they would look like or what if people start to treat human being as products like the way they switching their IPod.
To maintain my identity, I endeavor to satisfy what I have. I had been always thought about what I want to have but there are many things I already have such as IPod or cellphone. There are still many students who cannot have those things. It is frequent to forget about it. I also habitually neglect what I have. Not to become like the world in Brave New World, people have to speculate what they have and remain themselves what is the true happiness means.
Oct.3
-With technology, it seems destroying everything is the best way to solve problems.
I find the book, Brave New World, more fascinating as I go farther. First when I read the book, the story outline was too challenging to understand. However, when I reached chapter six, it starts to become the polar star up in the sky. It really makes me think a lot about the modern society. I am too dependent on technology. For example, while I was studying or painting, Ipod is always beside me. Also, I feel so uncomfortable if my Ipod is not with me. Not only my Ipod, but my computer is also beside me. There are always pros and coincidentally. While the technology helps me to live conveniently in school life, it suffocates me in pain. Students can use their personal individual computer while they are in classes so that they can multitask and it can save time. I think this would be starting not too far away. Because the technology develops too fast, it shuns nature. People start to close their eyes on nature like trees and forest. What they all care about is money.
In Langley, everywhere what I see the most is construction zones with gigantic vehicle and trucks. I cannot open window while I'm in car on highway. The two words in my mind when I face with those views are worries and continuous consumption. There is never end; people cannot cease their consumption and companies still have to make them consume. Everything is interconnected which means that people working in companies have to make others to spend their money in order to earn their salaries and those consuming again work to create products to earn money. It is a sustained cycle.
My questions are what makes people so generous in spending money and is there any accurate solutions for ceasing that massive production.
Oct. 14
- When I draw, creativity is the most important part.
In Advance Placement Art 11, I am working on my project with safety pins. The project is about creating ten different art pieces on 4" by 4" paper and all of them have to be used in graphite. Actually, it was my second time working on safety pins. A week ago, Mrs. Crawford gave another ten pieces of paper to create art pieces with relationship in safety pins. At that time, I did that project poorly and I got C for my mark.
After looking at other students in class and receiving feed backs from others, it intrigues me to work harsh and push myself harder. Somehow I felt very humiliated. It was my first time to feel embarrassed on my art.
Even though creating another ten art pieces with same material and same object is arduous, I feel excited. I think that it is a great opportunity to try hard and strive for my satisfaction on my ability. While I was working on my ten safety pins project, it has to be based on direct observation which means that observing meticulously and capture every facet in images of safety pin itself, not thinking of the concept and abstraction. Everyone would think safety pins are too small and useless to use them as art object, I find out that they also have many aspects I can obtain from. The ways the safety pin opens and how it is rolled at the end are so interesting. Not only does pin have many different sides I can use, but the material also is various. I am using only graphite for this project but i can grind it and use with water and also mix with oil to make more texture. It turns out so well. I cannot wait to produce four more.
Oct.21
In my A block, it was my first time learn about the book, "The Secret". I heard about this book, but I was not interested in reading it because I thought that book would be difficult to understand.
"The Secret" is about the positive thinking would lead to the success and the negative thinking would attract negative energy which would make things impossible. There are tons of people who believe in this topic and really are inspired by this book. However, as I heard this topic, I thought little further. What is the negative energy? What about people who everyday think positive but nothing happens? For example, people who suffer from hunger and pain (disease) do not have negative energy; instead they always prey for better situation or better circumstances. However, there are people who cannot be cured or rich enough to buy daily meals. What about children in Africa or China who suffer every time from hunger, it is true that they get support from rich countries but it is an only consistent solution for their hinder? Even though they think positively every day, I do not think their situation would be changed.
People (readers) would consider who wrote the book, "The Secret". He earned lots of money every month from selling this book. He is rich. He can have everything he want. In my opinion, the book could hurt some people who believe this book but nothing he or she wants happened. I think thinking is important like what the author said, but action is the first step to succeed. Only thinking would take a long time to attain what you want.
Oct. 31
-Time goes by as fast as lighting a matchstick.
Today is the last day of October. Already… It's been two months since the school has started. Every time I notice that each day passes so quickly. Sometimes I have a moment to think about the past by reading my own diary. It is very fascinating that I can see what I did at the same day in the past time.
Every last day of a month, I always think about what I have done during that month. October has passed so busy. I tried hard to re-motivate myself to work hard and get starting in school life; I was too relaxed because of the long summer vacation. Thinking of the past could bring me some depression but it can also help me to speculate what I have done wrong or what I should not do it again. It is hard to realize what my mistake and unnoticeable habits are. From thinking and writing my last year diary I can feel and regret about my behaviors which were filled with flaws.
Anyway, not only thinking about the past, but thinking and deciding about the future also is a considerable matter. Expecting what I am going to do in November is also a lot of fun; sometimes worries. I can say that it could be fear I am afraid of. Fear of no getting good marks or next art project are all combined together. I am the person who worries first before take action so it leads to the great abhorrence or distress. Knowing that act should go first, I think too much that eventually I give up.
I think the brainstorm about my random thoughts is like the doodle on the marge of the science note but it is what I usually do on the last day of October.
Nov.7
-There are various personalities to on individual.
Three objects for my personalities. For my new art project, all the students are required to pick three objects to draw with. Finding deeply on my own personality requires a lot of thinking. Because it is easy to be conditioned to be identical to others, this project makes me to have tons of brainstorms about myself.
Speculating my own property has been asked considerable amount of time in my life, so far. Every time I changed my school, attend the first day of new grades, or write an tedious essay, automatically I was forced to think about my characteristics and fill in the blanks in the blank-where it said, favorite subject or favorite food. Those questions are just shallow answers that I do not even have to think in order to fill the blanks. However, choosing three objects has to be related to authentic traits of me, and the only person who knows best is probably myself. As for me, finding my property is like solving inscrutable puzzles in short limited time.
Through my long repetition and vicissitude of thoughts eventually narrowed down to three objects: a spray, a music box, and a Polaroid picture. What the spray represents about me is the uncontrollable way the spray is spread and the ability to alter inside of the bottom with different component. Those illuminate that I am easily affected by the surrounding and others. The music box represents my motive and stimulus. This embodies my endurance of suffering and arousing myself to keep going. I got the idea from the last one, a Polaroid picture. The way the Polaroid picture slowly appears remains myself of long period of time to complete my work or decisions.
Now, I should go start drawing some compositions...
Nov. 17
-It is always nerve-racking being in front of people.
I did my Prezi presentation. Presenting something in front of many students always makes me sweating as if I am in sauna. However, I decided to do mine today. After Julian finished his Prezi presentation, I put up my hand in order to do mine; it was my first time to actually volunteer myself to do it. The classroom was deadly dark and the only brightness I could see was students’ eyes. The red lights in my English classroom did not bother me a lot at this moment. My legs shivered while I was walking in front of the class. As my English teacher connected my computer to the big screen which was already opened to Prezi presentation, my voice stroked the silence. I started it. Using Prezi made my presentation interesting. Also, I felt more comfortable and relax because the movement and images in Prezi were diverse. As I kept talking and answering questions throughout the presentation, I started to like resenting my ideas to others. However, after long time period passed, I finished it. The feeling of accomplishment was great but also the discontent coexisted. I kept thinking I could have done better or I should have spoken slowly.
My own diary is filled with everything I experienced. Today’s presenting also taught me how to represent my thought to others effectively, easily, and understandably. It is challenging because everyone has his or her own thoughts and backgrounds. Explaining also should not try to change others’ thinking, but it should make them to choose whether my idea can be take some places on their thoughts.
Nov. 28
-École Parsons à Paris
Choosing post-secondary schools is, at my age, a big decision and also gives a lot of stress to every student. This week, many different art schools come to our school to interview grade 12 students’ portfolio and introduce their schools to us. This is not my first time to watch their presentations; I watched them in last year but as I am grade 11, I have started to think more seriously about choosing post-secondary schools. Today was the first day and two art schools visited our school: California College of the Arts (CCA) and the Columbus College of Art and Design (CCAD). Both schools impressed me a lot. Even though I was not interested in those two schools, they gave art students a lot of suggestions about the portfolio and showing us their present students’ activities and art works in school. Since my major is visual art, it gave me an idea of life in art post-secondary schools. Having own studio, surrounding with great art faculties and students all over the world just blew my mind already.
I always imagine being a post-secondary student. I know it is a lot harsher than being in high school, but living campus life and explore my major with experts and doing internships would enrich my future life. I was excited and I am looking forward to see more schools, especially Paris Parsons College of Art!!
Dec. 5
-People have their own distinct thoughts, and they think they are always right.
Reading two short stories, in English class, gave me a lot of ideas related to the humans’ relationships. Through the short stories, “The Painted Door” and “A Business Relationship”, the interactions between people are revealed. In “The Painted Door”, the wife, Ann, has an affair with her husband’s friend, Steven because her husband goes out to take care of his father. However, he does care his wife, but not verbally. Therefore, after Carl comes back to his house, he finds out that his wife sleeps with his best friend, Steven, and he goes out and dies in a blizzard. I cannot say whose fault. However, what I know in the story is that both have a charge of Carl’s death and also his friend, Steve.
If I were Carl in this story, I would not leave the bedroom where Ann and Steven sleep together. After finding out their relationships, first I would take Steven out and beat him up. Then after Steven would leave the house, it would be necessary to have a serious conversion wit Ann. While talking with Ann, it would be possible to realize that Ann is lonely by herself in the isolated town. It would be hard to believe her again, but as I would try to be more emotional and verbally attach with her.
Dec. 13
-I took this picture during the music show.
Having the responsibility of taking pictures for the yearbook, I attended the music show at LFAS. I set up the tripod and my camera’s white balance in the middle of the seats. Even though I went with my friend, most of the seats were taken so I had to sit by myself and my huge camera. Because I am not a member of any of the bands at school, listening to what they are striving for and practicing was thrilling.
As the music show started, I was shocked. Every music composition that they played seemed like an emotional story; even the junior band played spectacular compositions. I could feel how much they practiced. Every time I passed through the music rooms, all I could hear was sound of all the unharmonious instruments. However, because of this music show, I realized my misapprehension. There was one student who was in the junior band playing the French horn. When he blew this gigantic instrument that was hard for him to even carry, his facial expression and the redness on his face showed his efforts and nerves at the concert. In order to create whole orchestra compositions as a group, every one of the members had to help each other.
Because our art major is individual, even though we give advice and suggestions, there are people who feel unsatisfied with their works and there are others who feel satisfied. However, while I was listening to their performance, I thought that they were playing as one huge team. That really left an impression on me!
Dec. 24
The Christmas means celebrating the birth of Jesus. However, the society keeps changing to just consuming and waiting for the Boxing Day. Understanding the true meaning of tradition is important. When people try to follow the tradition like Christmas, they should remind the meaning of it.
I spend most of the time in Catholic Church with my family. This Christmas was not my favorite. Not a lot shopping and just staying home with family were all about this day; but what I liked about it was I could have time to relax myself. Sitting on the bed and beside me there was lemon tee and I did a lot of questions for English blog which frustrated me with the fact that I had homework on winter vacation. This “boring” time really made me think deeply just like the lesson I learned from Brave New World. I felt comfortable and could think step by step. Having always busy days, that time refreshed my mind and impacts me to start the new year.
My question for this Christmas is do people know sometimes boredom can give them unique ideas and critical thinking.
Dec.3l
-I will try hard to keep my resolutions for this year.
During the last day of 2011… Finishing the year, I brainstormed the best moments of the past year and the things that did not work over the past year. My best moments of 2011 have to be during summer vacation and being involved in the visual art major. Spending my B block as an AP class and the last block as a major class, it made me improve thinking more critically and deeply and using that as an art piece. It was my first year learning about composition and exploring my own ways to create art medium experiments. Therefore, my last year was filled with art projects which I am still working on. Also, in Korea, I spent two amazing and busy months. Among those two months, meeting with all my grandparents and relatives and eating dinner were my favorite moments. Since I stay in Canada with only my immediate family, those moments meant a lot to me. When I lived in Korea, realizing and appreciating those significant moments never occurred to me; but now it is very obvious how the whole family could give me energy and happiness.
My father always tells me that everyone is given the same amount of time, but the difference is how they use that time. Like these words from my father, this new year, I will spend my time wisely and reduce wasting time pointlessly. I will utilize every bit of time so that I could create an outstanding and unique portfolio featuring my ideas and thoughts on or before December 1, 2012 when the portfolio day arrives.
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